Wednesday, August 29, 2007
I've been tagged by everyone's favorite lollipop lover, Anandamide with the question "If you were left alone on a deserted island, which celebrity would you choose to spend time with?"
As you can see this is serious question which requires some thought and effort, which I am feeling much too lazy to do. Since my immediate answer, Johnny Depp, is a bit dull and unimaginative, I thought I'd ask a few email buddies for their suggestions and weigh the pros and cons of each. Here are their choices:
1) Stephen Colbert- comedian, star of The Colbert Report.
PROS: He is hilarious and cute as a button. I would so love to give him a lap dance and pull his glasses off. I bet he'd blush like crazy.
CONS: The George Bush jokes might get a little old after a while. Plus he looks kind of wimpy. Between the two of us we might have a hard time surviving a deserted island.
2) Pete Doherty - singer, druggie, ex of Kate Moss
PROS: He would be sure to have plenty of drugs with him, which could help pass the time while we waited for rescue. If we ran out of drugs I could probably get high for the next few years just from licking his skin.
CONS: Too numerous to list.
3) Sigmund Freud - the "father of psychoanalysis." Yes, he is dead but the meme didn't rule out historical celebs. This is what you get when you ask a college professor for her suggestion.
PROS: Stuck on an island, we would have plenty of time to work on my issues.
CONS: I don't want to work on my issues. I'd rather pop a pill like everyone else.
4) Bear Grylls - British mountaineer and host of the show Man vs. Wild
PROS: Oh yeah, now this was a great suggestion! Bear would build me a condo out palm fronds and volcanic rock and figure out how to make wine from coconuts. Plus.....YEOW, he's smokin hot. I'd never want to be rescued.
CONS: Is there a con here? I did see him drink his own urine once on an episode of his TV show, but that's not a real big deal.
5> Jay Leno - host of The Tonight Show, comic. This suggestion came from my mother BTW.
PROS: According to my mom, Leno is, "cute, sweet, so funny, and I bet he has a large package." (I told you the woman is sex obsessed).
CONS: Not really my cup of tea, though he does seem like a really nice person. I saw him once at a coffee shop in Burbank and he spent half an hour signing autographs and chatting with people, which was pretty cool of him.
6) Wilson - beach ball, star of the movie Cast Away
PROS: Good conversationalist
CONS: unfortunately too round. I'd need something a little more phallic shaped.
So after weighing the pros and cons of each of these celebrities I think I will pick......Johnny Depp! No, actually I'd like to be shipwrecked with all of them so that way they could worship me as their queen and I'd never get bored or sexually frustrated. Thanks to everyone who was nice enough to return my email.
Now comes the fun part. Who shall I tag with this assignment? Normally I never tag people since I'm all cool and laid back like that. I just say "Do it if you want to." But today I am feeling especially evil and bitchy since I've been trying to ween myself off of caffeine (or at least the massive quantities of caffeine that I usually injest). So....who shall it be? Let me think....okay here we go, I am going to tag LA, Diane, Mister Underhill, Memphis Steve, Scottsdale Girl, and Helen. And what's more, I am hereby tagging anyone who regularly visits this blog but never comments. You lurkers know who you are. Say something or suffer the wrath of (cue the sound effects) "The Great and Terrible Desert Island Meme". Muyhahahahahaha.