Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Today in History

June 12, 1667 - the world's first successful blood transfusion is carried out.

June 12, 1812 - Napoleon Bonaparte invades Russia.

June 12, 1994- OJ Simpson killed Nicole Brown and Ron Goldman.

June 12, 197? - Prunella Jones was born into the world feet first, causing her mother hours (and subsequent years) of agony.

Yep, it's my birthday. Woo hoo! Which makes me a Gemini. According to my horoscope Gemini's are creative, fun, and good liars, but they are also superficial, nosy, indecisive and fickle. I can't help but believe in astrology when it hits the nail on the head like that.

Here are some quotes by others who share my birthday:

"I know the human being and fish can coexist peacefully." George Bush Senior, ex-president

"YESSSSSS! I do like to dress in women's clothing and bite people." Marv Albert, sportscaster

"I think I am virgin. That means I never put it in the butt, yes?" Adriana Lima, supermodel

"Well, gollllly!" Jim Nabors, actor

As you can plainly see, those born on June 12th are incredibly deep thinkers.

It is also National Sausage Tasting Day in Holland.

When I did a google search for June 12th this image came up:

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Finish this sentence: This year for her birthday, Pru should ______ a) get dressed up, hit the bars, and end the evening puking in the parking lot like she always does. b) get the raccoon picture tattooed on her back. c) adopt an orphan and shave her head, d) go down to the Scientology Center for her free birthday e-metering. e) get some Indian food, a bottle of wine, a new book, and behave herself. f) do some coke and make out with Brandon Davis in the men's toilet of Club Skank.

Here are Five Fascinating, Never Revealed Facts about Me:

1) English is actually my second language. Being from the Inland Empire, my native language is Hick. I also understand Redneck, Homeboy, and a few words of Klingon.

2) Since I haven't been able to decide on a new hairstyle, my hair has gotten very long. It nearly reaches my waist. I like to flip it off my shoulder and pretend I'm Marcia Brady.

3) I weighed eight pounds when I was born. I now weigh more than that.

4) I was fourth runner-up in the Miss Farmbureau pagent in high school. The girl who won was totally having sex with the judges!

5) There is a mosquito bite on my left big toe. It itches.

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Look, Britney is sending me a birthday greeting. Aw thanks, Britster, I love you too.


MJ said...

Happy Birthday, PRU!

D. Prince said...

Wishing you lots of Happy Birthday's! Hope you have a fantastic day.

Diane said...

Happy Birthday! I can't to hear about what Shirley and El Hombre get you for your special day

Captain Smack said...

Wow, OJ's double homicide was on your birthday? No wonder you turned out, um, you know, like you are.


Happy Birthday, Prunella - and I think you should do some coke and make out with Brandon Davis in the men's toilet of Club Skank, but then I tell everyone they should do that.

Scottsdale Girl said...

Happy Berfday Sistah!!!!

I got to go with Option A or Option E1 - which substitutes sushi for indian food. :)

Have a most AWESOME DAY!

M-M-M-Mishy said...

Many happy returns, Pru! You've certainly got a lot of interesting people who share your birthday as well as a lot of interesting events that took place...

I say go for option F. Brandon Davis gives out the coolest of cool nicknames...

Prunella Jones said...

MJ and D.- thank you very much. I appreciate the good wishes. I need all the help I can get.

Diane- so far I have gotten nothing but a thorough butt sniffing. Shirley the beagle is still asleep but I suspect she'll give me a kiss.

Captain- Oh good, I was leaning toward Brandon anyway. But quit recommending him to people! He's overbooked. He could could only schedule me in tonight from 11:10 to 11:23. That's barely enough time for me to get off. Luckily KFed had an opening for midnight.

SG- Thank you, my love, but I can't eat sushi anymore. The texture of raw fish in my mouth reminds me of slugs, and that reminds me of the time someone put a slug in my boot as a prank, which made me scream so loud that it startled my roommate, causing her to drop the pitcher of margaritas she was mixing, which shattered all over the floor nearly slicing off her foot and making a bloody mess. So now I forever associate sushi with wasted alcohol. But California rolls are still good.

Prunella Jones said...

Mish- You are so right! But I have blonde hair instead of red. What do you think he'll call my crotch? Oh yeah, and the curtains don't exactly match the drapes if you know what I mean.

Sudiegirl said...

happy birthday mah friend!


i share a birthday with mia farrow and joe pesci...does that mean i should adopt a bunch of kids, sleep with Woody Allen and then ask everyone what the f*** is so funny about me.

honkeie2 said...

I was born in 1976...I showed u mine now show me yours

Scottsdale Girl said...

Pru: um yeah, I would not be able to eat sushi either.

EmmaK said...

the answer is f) quite obviously. Have a coked out birthday!

morbid misanthrope said...

Happy Birthday. Another interesting fact: Pig Destroyer's Phantom Limb came out today. So, you should cut off the toe with the mosquito bite, send it to your favorite celebrity with a threatening letter, drink a bunch of cheap absinthe out of a bucket, and then sell overpriced maps to celebrity homes while calling yourself Lindsay Lohan's down-on-her-luck interesting personality. That or the Scientology thing.

GetFlix said...

Happy B-day, Pru!!

ffleur said...

Happy Birthday Pru!

May I suggest a big makeout session with El Hombre?

LA said...

Ahh, a Gemini footling breech!

I choose E.

Many happy returns, Pru, and may all your dreams and wishes come true.

Prunella Jones said...

Sudie- that sounds pretty good. Except for the sleeping with Woody Allen part.

Honk- Ha ha. Nice try, old man. As if!

SG- bad connotations can put you off a food forever.

Emmak- I like the way you think! But I didn't have any coke. I ended up snorting some Flintstones chewables instead. I didn't get very high, but all those vitamins did make me more smarter.

Morbid- you always have the best ideas. I wish I'd done that instead of drinking all those Midori and tomato juice cocktails!

GF- thanks dude!

Ffleur- um, are you serious? Why would I want to make out with El Hombre? He's not famous!

LA- yep. It's amazing that my mom wasn't given a cesarean. But then I WAS born in a military hospital. I'm told it took the doctors a while to get me breathing after they yanked me out. That probably explains everything.

brendalove@gmail.com said...


Congratuations on being another year closer to death. You're the best, Pru!

Prunella Jones said...

Thanks Bren! All those cocktails I had will probably shorten my lifespan as well.

Scottsdale Girl said...

What did you get?

huh? huh? What?

T-girl said...

Happy Birthday Pru!!!!

As a gift I am going to send all the sick fucks that keep emailing and posting on my blog looking for a t-girl! I have one right now from Iran who is a real doozy, he doesn't give up- you'll LOVE him! Look for a post in the near future on this problem! LOL Eitherway... all yours!

prettykitty said...

aw, happy belated birfday, pru. i hope you didn't do something too crazy and have to spend it in rehab or the mental ward of some prison.

Prunella Jones said...

SG- lots of gift certificates.

T- um....thanks?

PK- well, I wasn't going to say anything but that's where I have been for the past few days. Luckily the sheriff let me go early due to the fact that being in jail was bumming me out.

Frannie Farmer said...

Oh happy belated Birthday Pru -- sorry I missed it... I am such a loser blog pal these days!
Hope you had soooo much fun.