Monday, May 28, 2007

Lindsay's Excellent Adventure

Friday, May 25, 4:00 AM

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

Ah that party was so bitchin! (sniff sniff) Let's go pick up some brews and corn-nuts from this mini mart and then head back to my car. I'll drive.

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket


Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

OMG! What the heck? Strange things are afoot at the Circle K!

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

Dude, it's me. I mean it's you. I mean it's Lindsay, from the future. Listen whatever you do tonight, DO NOT DRIVE! I totally mean it.

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

Trippy. (sniff sniff) I must be really high.

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

No, this is, like, true. If you, like, drive tonight you are so totally going to crash your Mercedes into a tree. And then, like, the cops are going to find drugs in your car and you'll be, like, arrested. It will so suck!

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

Yeah. Okay. Whatever. (sniff sniff) Hey do you have any coke on ya?

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

Oh sure, totally. Come on, let's just go behind this time machine thingy so the paps don't see us.


ffleur said...

I read a blind item that her mother's way to deal with this is to carry the coke for her. Ah yeah, mother of the year.

Watch all the spin coming out now. It will be someone else's fault (paps chasing her?) and someone else's drugs (her willing friends) and another hospitalization (lets see what hasn't she used: exhaustion & dyhydration? used, asthma? used, appendix? used, hmmm...she needs to check with some rock stars and see what excuses they use when they overdose)

And didn't her "people" see the irony of an underaged drinker, already thru rehab, having a vodka company sponsor her b-day party? Hello? why can't she pay for her own damn party like ordinary people do?

Prunella Jones said...

So true, Ffleur.

I love these pictures. Check out that coke face. She is so working that mouth, like my grandma does when her false teeth are sliding. Except my grandma is smart enough to stay home when she's sucking up the sweet, sweet, nose candy.

GetFlix said...

How much does it cost to take a cab in LA anyways?

LA said...

I so hope she ends up sharing a cell with Parasite. Or Nicole Richie. It's only a matter of time until one of these stupid bitches kills someone.

M-M-M-Mishy said...

Ffleur: You mean your momma doesn't carry your stash for you? Harsh!

These people need to go to jail. Not some fluffy rehab centre; JAIL. End of story. A "usable amount of cocaine" isn't something to play around with. This shit isn't going to be "cute" when someone dies. And it can happen. Look what happened to that guy from Prison Break. And Brandy's lawyer has quite a few lawsuits to sort through right now.

P.S. Pru - that's a major coke face she's sporting. You can pretty much track her career in photographs by the amount of "glaze" in her eyes.

Prunella Jones said...

GF- obviously she can afford it whatever it costs. The problem is all celebrities are idiots. I have often wondered why this was the case. Is it because few of them are educated? Something in the water in Hollywood? Maybe having flashbulbs constantly in your face causes brain deterioration?
I have since decided it's because the only reason for them to exist is to amuse us with their stupidity.

Prunella Jones said...

LA- I'd enjoy seeing them all in stripped uniforms breaking rocks but it ain't going to happen.

Mish- I never let my mom carry my stash. That bitch totally bogarts it.

Frannie Farmer said...

What exactly is a usable amount of cocaine? I mean is there a portion that you might not use if you were one to use in the first place?

Prunella Jones said...

That's a good question. It does seem strangely worded. Any amount of coke is useable I should think. I've known people who would lick the carpet on the chance (or hope) that they might have dropped a bit.

morbid misanthrope said...

If she would just start snorting Draino like I keep hoping, she'd never crash a car again.

Prunella Jones said...

I totally agree. Kids today are such wimps. Why back in my day we didn't have the money for none of that fancy white stuff. When we wanted to get high we huffed gas and drank hairspray and we didn't cry none either when our brains leaked out of our ears, not like these candy-asses nowadays.

Besides DUI's are fast becoming the new black. Very hip.

Captain Smack said...

That, my friends, is not coke face. That's ecstasy face.

Prunella Jones said...

Captain- I think you are right. She sure is clenching that jaw. She should have just gotten a lollipop and gone dancing and she could have avoided this whole mess.

I took ecstacy one time but it wasn't much fun. Instead of making me feel all sensual and happy like it was supposed to, it made me speak with an incredibly fake British accent! For twelve hours straight I said stuff like, "Cor Blimey" and "bugger" and "you must now chop down this tree with a herring!" I also had the strong urge to go out and adopt an African orphan. Luckily I am too poor to do anything like that. I did however end up buying an ancient parrot named Jarvis while I was high. Everyday I am reminded of my folly as I listen to him squawk "Cheerio luv" over and over. said...


LOLOLOL am I the only one that caught that one?

PixieGaf said...

This girl is heading down the same path as Pete Doherty.

Prunella Jones said...

Bren- yes it is from the movie about yhe most excellent ones.

Pix- those two should get together. It would make for some pretty hilarious pictures.

T-girl said...

OMG! THAT is the funnies thing ever! Kind of bummed she is in Rehab now. I only have Britney to make fun of now! :(

Prunella Jones said...

I hear that!