Thursday, October 16, 2008

Debate Haikus

I watched the debates last night. I must say, there was way too much talk about some guy named Joe the Plumber. Who cares about Joe the Plumber? What about Prunella the Stripper? What about my needs, huh? No one addressed those!


Where was John's flag pin?
Does he hate America?
Say it ain't so, Joe!


Palin make good prez
cause she understands retards
being one herself.


Is that an ACORN
stuffed in McCain's cheek or is
he happy to see me?


Looks like he can't tell
Autism from Down Syndrome.
That's mavericky.


Joe the plumber? Yawn
enough with the plumber's cracks!
See what I did there? ;)


McCain/Palin have
an exciting new plan for
healthcare in the U.S.

Doctors aren't needed.
We shall simply ask God to
cast thy demons out!


So Sarah Palin
is a breast of freth air, eh?
blink..blink..blink..blink..blink


Joe the Plumber and
Joe Six-Pack are now in love.
Why can't they marry?


Your concern for the
health of mothers is touching.
(Air quotes) Fuck you bitch!


Angry, mean old man
I'm not gonna vote for you
but will stay off your lawn.

17 comments:

xl said...

I saw clips of the debate on the news this morning.

By not watching the actual debate, I saved 90 minutes AND much prefer this version! :)

Prunella Jones said...

News pundits should give
their opinions in haiku
much entertainment.

Warped Mind of Ron said...

I watched the entire debate, but I think I may have fallen asleep. Did Obama jump up and punch McCain at some point and then McCain rip off his face and reveal he was Skelator and start a ninja fight on camera?

Fucktard Savant said...

You watched the debate? You are far braver than I. I was afraid I would explode into rage and shoot my tv again, and since I'm not pulling down a sweet plumber's salary I have to be careful. I think plumber is the only non fast food job that's hasn't been outsourced yet, so it makes sense that they talk about it.

Prunella Jones said...

Ron-

yes, that is right
they then pulled out light sabers
it was so bitchin!

Fucktard-

Joe shouldn't complain
his job is safe as is mine
they can't outsource tits.

Diane said...

fucking brilliant

Prunella Jones said...

Diane-

Hate for McCain strong
like two shots of espresso
hate fires up brain cells.

fashion herald said...

if only CNN could do this. and i'm pretty sure everyone's a lot more interested in prunella the stripper than joe the fake plumber.

Bill Stankus said...

After each of us ponies up seven grand for the Wall St. bailout - who can afford either plumbers or strippers.

Besides, like many Hollywood boobs, it turns out Joe is a fake. And so is Palin and McCain.

Terrific.

Prunella Jones said...

Fashion-

I am ready for
my close up on CNN
and also Oprah.

Bill-

Fascism will come wrapped
in a flag and holding a cross.
Heil Sarah Palin!

me said...

Joe the Plumber and
Joe Six-Pack are now in love.
Why can't they marry?

I liked that one the best.

I was excited to hear that the plumber and the six pack will now not only be able to marry in California and Massachusetts, but also Connecticut!

Here is my haiku a/b it:

Plumber and Six Pack
Marry in Connecticut
Happy, happy day

U like? ha!

kookla@work said...

That ACORN and plumber's crack had me guffawing. I swear if you had written 75% of the skits on SNL this past weekend, it would have been funnier than all the MacGruber sketches combined.

Krissyface said...

I love you, Prunella.

UBERMOUTH said...

Is it possible that any American president can look bad after Bush?

Prunella Jones said...

Me- I did like that one!

Marriage is for two
who cares about the gender?
God made all of us.

Kook-

I love Tina Fey
Amy Poehler too, otherwise
SNL is dull.

Krissy-

You're in luck, I'm free.
If New York makes it legal
we'll get hitched! Sound good? ;)

Ubermouth-

One wouldn't think so
but leave it to us to find
someone even worse!

LA said...

Bravo!!!

Cheasty said...

new poet laureate, prunella de ville. these rock!